Interpersonal Communication

I did not go to work today because I need to take a rest due to minor illness. Well I really enjoyed this day, waking up late, eating whenever I want, watching tv and browsing internet all day long. As a matter of fact I can do this everyday, just spending my time in the room. Often, I find myself comfortable and at peace whenever I am alone doing what I want like reading books, listen to music and even watching videos about cooking and elements outside earth (yes, I do love facts and stories about universe, even aliens too!). I am a shy type person, I can still remember when I was still in my teenage years, I won't talk to a person unless he or she talks to me, sounds arrogant but that is who I am. Actually I became more friendly when I got into college but until now I am still the shy type little girl full of insecurities with lack of self confidence (where can I buy one seriously?). I always think I don't have skills, talents or some extra-ordinary stuff to be proud of, yes I am good at bashing myself. When can I really have the confidence and trust for myself? I really don't know, but good things come for those who wait. I'll just sit back, relax and enjoy whoever I am today! 

This is just a piece of my never ending thoughts.:)

The one that got away.

Phone's battery is near empty, but I couldn't stop my fingers from typing. I am currently in the middle of the road, experiencing bad traffic and all I can do to entertain myself is to write this blog.

Another morning, another chance to do something good, something that will make me a better person but actually I am not in the mood to go to work, I am on the brink of telling a lie that I don't feel well.

Well maybe this is just a consequence of choosing a normal life. My heart knows what I really want but my body and mind hinder me to take an action.

Since I was in highschool, I know what I want and where I want to go, I imagined the career I want to pursue. When I got in college, I Started to dream big, I started to believe that I can achieve what I want in life. but when my dreams were already in my hands, life gave me a reality check and I chose to let it go.

I realized that even how passionate you are in what you are doing, it doesn't mean it is for you. Everytime I watch television or commercials or even listen to radio, It brings me so much pain because they keep on reminding me that even though I gave my all, it's just that, it is really not meant for me.

But who knows, maybe God has a bigger, better and much glamorous plans ahead for me. He knows what I want, and he knows how much I love it.

The mighty one

There are a lot of things to be thankful for.

I went to school to pass the requirements in one of our subjects, it felt so good and excited because I know I already passed the subject, but there are a lot more things to do, I still have many assignments to work on.

When I think about myself these past few weeks, I am terribly terrified to what will happen to my future if I don't accomplished everything. I was hopeless and thoughts of giving up were starting to get in my head, but in one blink of an eye, God started to take over. 

Yes, God gave me the help i badly needed. Maybe he just tested how far can I go, and when he saw how bad my situation is, he use his instruments to send help. 

We people (yes including me) tend to forget God in times of happiness or when we are too busy and pre-occupied with our job or other important matters to do but him, he never forgets us. Even if we don't pray at night or thank him before we eat our food, he never fails to bless us.

I am a living witness of God's grace and mercy. I can testify a hundred times how good and loving God is. He answered almost all of our prayers, he is generous, kind and has a never ending support and love for his children.

Let's praise him always for we owe everything to the Lord. God bless everyone!

It is because I can't sleep

Girls my age are most likely living their life to the fullest, partying, having dates, vacationing in different places, and the likes. 24 is not too young and not too old, it is a perfect age to do whatever you want  for as long as you are not doing illegal things. It is the age when you can already dream and imagine your perfect wedding, the details, the gown, the church, anything you want for it. How happy and relaxing to be young.

Not for me, as early as 24 I am already full of worries and doubts. I am worried for my family's health because I am not yet ready to lose my parents so I always pray to God to always give us good health and happy life. I am doubting myself if I can get the job I want and I am freaking nervous about it. I want to give my parents their own house and I am frustrated because I can't give it to them with my current situation. Last but not the least, I want to be married!! Yup! I am just 24 but almost ready for a wedding!! I want to have a baby at the age of 25 because I want to give my parents a grand child as soon as possible! But we can't so it will just stay as a "want".😢 

Can I call this a blog or a rant? Whatever!